Rebirth as a Wind Cultivator

Xiulan signaled to the guards. "Move that brazier closer." She pointed to the desired spot, watching them shuffle the metal container across the stone courtyard. "Now the wire rack—yes, right there."

The makeshift grill looked ridiculous, but after adjusting the height of the rack over the coals, she nodded with satisfaction. This should work well enough.

Behind her, the borrowed table displayed the chaotic aftermath of her kitchen raid—various bowls, ingredients, and utensils scattered across its surface. All the kitchen staff except for the head cook had fled after her whirlwind of demands, leaving only their supplies behind.

Half the garrison packed the courtyard, their faces a mix of awe and terror as they watched the spectacle. Manager Han moved through the crowd, murmuring reassurances, while Xiulan focused on her improvised cooking setup.

The source of everyone’s fascination proved impossible to ignore.

Steel rang against steel as Feng Yu and Ren Chun clashed in the center of the yard. Their forms blurred with impossible speed, weapons singing through the air faster than most eyes could track. Each strike sparked and echoed across the stones.

"Remember your promises!" Xiulan called out as a particularly loud clash made several guards flinch. "No spiritual arts, no property damage!"

The duelists acknowledged with quick nods, never breaking their deadly dance. Their blades continued to flash and spin, testing each other’s limits without crossing into truly dangerous territory.

Xiulan stifled a yawn as she watched the two cultivators trade blows. The initial excitement of their duel had faded after an hour of repetitive clashing. Even their superhuman speed and precision failed to maintain her interest.

Who would have thought watching a duel could be so... dull?

The absurdity struck her—here stood two fighters demonstrating skills beyond mortal limits, and all she wanted was a proper burger. Her past life’s American tastes demanded satisfaction.

"Manager Han!" Xiulan waved the nervous man over. "I need ground beef prepared. Finely minced, not the usual chunks."

The head cook failed to hide his bewildered look as she demonstrated the proper thickness for cutting potatoes. His confusion deepened when she fashioned a crude deep-fry basket from spare wire mesh.

"Honored Miss Lin..." The head cook stuttered at her next request. "That much salt would cost more than premium cuts of meat."

Xiulan pulled out a heavy pouch of silver and clanked it on the improvised table top. "The cost is irrelevant. Bring me the salt!"

The cook’s eyes widened at the casual display of wealth. "Miss… you don’t actually need to pay me. The salt belongs to the house already." He bowed deeply and scurried off to fulfill her request.

Xiulan rolled the seasoned meat between her palms, forming perfect spheres before pressing them flat into patties. The familiar motions transported her back to backyard barbecues with college friends before her student debt had ruined her prospects.

The salt arrived, and she hurried to add it to the meat. Satisfied with the result, it was time. Each patty sizzled as it hit the heated rack above the glowing coals.

The pot of oil began to bubble. She lowered the heat under it a little by moving the coals. Then she dropped the cut potatoes into the makeshift fryer, stepping back as droplets popped and danced. The aroma of frying potatoes filled the courtyard, drawing curious looks from the guards still watching the ongoing duel.

Definitely not Five Guys quality, but it’ll do.

Her knife moved with practiced precision across the wooden cutting board. Onions fell into thin rings, tomatoes into perfect circles. The unfamiliar Chinese lettuce proved more challenging—its leaves broader and tougher than iceberg—but she managed decent-sized pieces.

"What manner of dish is this?" The head cook peered over her shoulder.

"Something from far away." Xiulan said before turning to the jury-rigged deep-fryer. She lifted the wire basket, golden fries draining above the oil. After she set them out in a basket, she scattered salt across them while still hot, the crystals adhering to the crispy exterior.

The patties needed flipping. She slid the spatula beneath each one, revealing perfectly browned undersides. The bread—not quite right for burgers but passable—waited in neat slices on a clean cloth.

No mayonnaise, no cheese. The thought pained her, but she pushed ahead. Layer by layer, she assembled each burger: bread, lettuce, meat, tomato, onion, more bread. The finished products looked almost right.

Xiulan pointed at the finished burgers. "Make these for everyone."

The head cook bowed deeply. "At once, Miss Lin." He hurried inside, no doubt to round up the scattered kitchen staff.

"Ren Chun! Feng Yu! Fighting’s over—time to eat!" Xiulan shouted across the courtyard.

The clashing of steel intensified. Their forms blurred faster, each strike more ferocious than the last. The air crackled with competitive energy as both fighters pushed for a decisive victory.

"Stubborn idiots." Xiulan waited another minute before shouting again. The only response came in the form of accelerated attacks and thunderous impacts.

Fine. We’ll do this the hard way.

Xiulan stepped away from her cooking station. Wind buffeted her face as she approached the dueling pair. The force of their strikes created visible ripples, distorting the space between them.

"Ren Chun! Feng Yu! Stop that right now!"

They remained lost in their battle-trance, oblivious to her commands. Well, not oblivious. They were both obviously working to make sure their fight didn’t slam into her.

Xiulan channeled qi into her palms, compressed it tight, then slammed her hands together above her head. The resulting thunderclap shot skyward in a visible shockwave.

The duelists froze mid-strike, weapons locked together as they turned to stare at her.

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Xiulan crossed her arms and glared at them both. "Three hours. You’ve been at this for three hours, and I’m done cooking. Now put those away and come eat."

"Y-you can’t just interrupt a duel like that!" Ren Chun lowered his blade, sweat dripping from his brow.

Feng Yu nodded in agreement, her amber eyes fixed on Xiulan.

Xiulan straightened her back and lifted her chin. "This is my family’s home, and you are both guests here." She gestured at the surrounding courtyard. "Lin family traditions are quite strict about duels. They cannot last longer than an hour, and they must stop when dinner is served." The lie flowed smoothly from her lips. "As guests, you need to respect our rules."

Feng Yu’s amber eyes narrowed after a few seconds of silence. "Did you just make that up?"

"I spent over an hour cooking something special for you both." Xiulan stuck out her bottom lip in an exaggerated pout. The scent of grilled meat and fried potatoes wafted between them now that the air calmed down.

Ren Chun pressed his hand against his mouth, but a snicker escaped anyway. His shoulders shook with barely contained laughter.

A smile tugged at Feng Yu’s lips as she fought to maintain her composure.

"If you insist on continuing..." Xiulan raised her hands to the side of her face, ready to raise them and clap again. "I’ll keep doing this until you’re done."

"No!" Feng Yu sheathed her sword in one fluid motion and raised her hands in surrender. "I’d rather not end up buried in the wall."

Ren Chun sheathed his blade as well and then placed his fist in palm and saluted Feng Yu. "Your skill with the blade surpasses expectations. We should continue this match at a more... appropriate time and place."

"Indeed." Feng Yu returned the formal salute. "Best not to test family traditions—especially those involving spiritual art cultivators." She glanced at Xiulan. "That Thunder God Claps technique proved quite fearsome."

Did she just... Xiulan squinted at the casual way Feng Yu butchered the name.

"That?" Ren Chun snorted. "A little thing compared to Thunder God Splits the Sky."

Heat rushed to Xiulan’s cheeks. She planted her hands on her hips and fixed Ren Chun with an icy stare. "How would you feel if someone called your sword technique ’Stone Sundering’ instead of ’River Stone Sundering Strike’?"

Ren Chun blinked rapidly. "I’d think they got it wrong?"

"Exactly!" Xiulan jabbed a finger toward Feng Yu, whose amber eyes widened. "The proper name is ’Thunder God Claps for Arrogant Young Masters!’"

The finger swung toward Ren Chun. "And it is ’Thunder God Splits the Sky and Fucks You Up!’"

Xiulan lifted her chin. "Get it right!"

Feng Yu’s jaw dropped, her composed demeanor shattering for a brief moment. She turned to Ren Chun. "Are these names real?"

"They are." Ren Chun nodded slowly. "I can hardly believe it myself."

Feng Yu leaned forward, amber eyes bright with curiosity. "What other terrifying techniques does Master Qingfeng teach you?"

Xiulan frowned. "Qingfeng?"

"You mentioned he was your master," Ren Chun said.

"Oh, no." Xiulan shook her head. "I made those techniques up myself."

The courtyard fell silent. Both cultivators stared at her with identical expressions of disbelief etched across their faces.

"Made it up..." Ren Chun started.

"...on your own?" Feng Yu finished.

The smell of cooling food snapped Xiulan’s attention back to the table. "Tsk. You’re wasting time with all this talking." She gestured at the perfectly arranged burgers. "The food will get cold, and fries are best eaten hot. If you don’t want to ruin all my hard work, come eat now!"

Xiulan looked over her shoulder with satisfaction as both cultivators followed her to the table, too bewildered to argue further.

After everyone was seated, she lifted her burger with both hands. "Watch carefully. You hold it like this, and bite straight through all the layers." She demonstrated, savoring the familiar taste of grilled beef, the crunch of fresh vegetables, and the fluffy bread.

Ren Chun studied the strange food arrangement before mimicking her grip. His first bite sent a tomato slice shooting out the back of his bun. "This is... messy."

"That’s part of the appeal." Xiulan gestured to the fries. "These you eat with your fingers."

Feng Yu picked up a single fry with practiced grace, examining it before taking a delicate bite. Her amber eyes widened. "The salt brings out the taste of the potato."

"Always strange." Ren Chun shook his head while assembling his burger back together. "First those Thunder God techniques, now foreign dishes that require instructions to eat."

Feng Yu dabbed at her lips with a napkin, fighting back a smile. "The combination proves quite innovative, though perhaps challenging to maintain proper etiquette."

They ate and chatted for a while; the conversation flowing between safe topics. But there was something Xiulan wanted. She looked at Feng Yu.

"Your schedule permitting," Xiulan set down her half-eaten burger, "would you consider helping with my next task? Ren Chun assisted with the blood lotus collection—we both benefited from that venture. The dawn serpent scales could offer similar opportunities."

"Schedule..." Feng Yu paused mid-bite. "I lack specific commitments at present. Though hunting that bounty seemed promising—a thousand spirit stones might prove difficult to obtain helping you."

"Something to consider." Xiulan nodded.

"But—" Ren Chun started.

"Don’t worry." Xiulan cut him off. "I plan to work on your earth reinforcement pill tonight once the Treasure Pavilion delivers my supplies. If everything proceeds smoothly, you’ll have it tomorrow."

Feng Yu paused mid-bite. "Fairy Lin is an alchemist too?"

"Ha!" Ren Chun swallowed his mouthful of burger. "She knows herbs and spiritual arts. The only thing she lacks is any skill at martial arts or techniques."

"That sounds rather lopsided." Feng Yu replied.

"You should have seen when I tried teaching her Water Stepping Foot. You know what she did...?" Ren Chun leaned forward.

"What...?" Feng Yu’s amber eyes sparkled with interest.

Xiulan glanced between them, a frown deepening on her face.

"Instead of doing it properly, she just used her monstrous qi to make a big disc twice her size to stand on!" Ren Chun slapped the table.

Heat rushed to Xiulan’s cheeks. "What do you mean? What else was I supposed to do?"

Feng Yu pressed her hand to her mouth, but a soft laugh escaped anyway. She picked up another fry, studying it with renewed interest. "What other pills can you make? Maybe a fire reinforcement pill?"

Xiulan tapped her chin, considering the ingredients and processes needed. "With the right materials, I could probably manage it."

"Hmm." Feng Yu held up the fry like a tiny wand. "I need one. If you could help me get one, I’d definitely come help with your mission."

Ren Chun stopped eating and looked unhappy. "What! But the favor…"

Xiulan’s eyes lit up. Treasure Pavilion would have any ingredients they couldn’t collect for the fire pill. The five basic elemental reinforcement pills were all made the same way and wouldn’t be a problem with the pill furnace.

"Haa, that sounds like a plan!" Xiulan grinned.