The Grand Mistress

"Yes, I mean it," Simione answered after a very long time. She did think that letting it all go would cause her more pain but surprisingly it didn\'t because her heart then went numb. She couldn\'t feel a thing, not hate nor pity, just regrets. Regret for their love, for the love she thought had a promising future but now, there wasn\'t left with it.

"Do you hate me Sisi?" Lyndon asked. He was feeling complex then, like for once he was relieved that Simione already knew and that he didn\'t have to keep hiding his woman away yet there was also a part that feels empty and some fear, fear that in the future, he might regret the thing he sacrificed now.

Simione looked at the man in his eyes and saw the flicker of desperation. She did not understand the complexity she saw in his eyes. Why was he doubting? Why was he hesitant? Perhaps she did see wrong because right at this moment, she was pretty sure he was all relieved that he didn\'t have to keep hiding away.

As per his question whether or not she hates him—there was a part of her that does hate him yet a big part of her heart loves him more than anything else.

"I don\'t," Simione replied melancholy. Not that she was lying but because she was saddened by the fact that no matter how much he  hurt her, she could do nothing but just forgive him. That was how much she loved him, she was willing to overlook all the wrong and forgave the man yet it was such a pity that he doesn\'t feel the same way anymore. What happened to the love he once promised her? Was it that easy to forget and leave behind?

"If you don\'t really hate me, then can you please come home with me? Lyndon asked. He didn\'t know why but seeing how Simione felt right then, he felt like he was going to lose her. Something that he never thought he\'d fear of until now. Initially, when he started feeling for another woman and started wooing her, he only thought that Simione would always stay in his life no matter what would\'ve happened. That she will always be his as he had always owned her. He always has her. Ever Since they were young, saving Simione was always his specialty and he always took pride in it as it makes a man out of him. Seeing her trusting him with all his heart, he knew their bond was forever tied, he was after all her savior, didn\'t she always say that? Therefore he will always have her heart and respect.

However the Simione that Lyndon saw right then wasn\'t that girl anymore. The one sitting beside him right now  had unfaltering and unbending eyes. It was like she had turned into a wild flower in a snap of a finger. He cannot predict him anymore and so his previous assurance that she won\'t leave was becoming a hope now that he wanted to believe.

"Sisi? Please come home with me," Lyndon was like begging her. He always felt like Simione belonged to the Tang\'s mansion, that was her home and will forever be hers. "Grandma and grandfather is already worried,"

Simione thinks through it for a while. She was eighteen now and was graduating anytime soon. The Tang mansion too was getting a bit little for Lyndon, his woman and her. She thought right then perhaps she should no longer go back there. Back then, she stayed in the Tang\'s mansion because of Lyndon\'s favor. Now that she no longer has it, perhaps she should no longer stay. However, how about Madam Silicia and grandfather Williams? The two had always been so good and generous with her that all these years, they took her in their care without asking for anything.

"Sisi…"

"I\'ll come home…" She wasn\'t sure of it but she had said anyway.  "I want to stay here in the village for a while, I\'ll come home if I\'m ready,"

"But..isn\'t it your graduation already? You need to come back to Devon City and—"

"Brother Don, starting from now on let me think of myself. Don\'t worry about me anymore," Simione cut him off now that he was trying to remind her of school and all the things she needed to be. Simione had not seen this before and it only became apparent now that she and Lyndon had been on different sides, it felt like all her life, she had chosen to be the person he wanted.

Lyndon thought she needed to know how to bake, so she learned how to.

He thought she would become an asset in the Tang\'s corporation, so she studied business.

He thought it would be good for Simione to take care of Madam Silicia and grandfather Williams, so Simione stayed in Devon City ignoring all the scholarships she had abroad.

Whenever there was something that Lyndon suggested or would want her to do, she faithfully did it for him without question. 

Only then did Simione realise, her whole world revolved around him and so she had barely had anything for herself. Not even some dreams. She was hopeless. Futureless.

Had she not given him too much? How was it that after everything, he still chose to break her heart? And yet at the end, this foolish heart of hers still beat for him, only and only him. Perhaps it was because of  the absence of anyone who cares for her did Simione find Lyndon\'s presence very important. At the point of her life that she lost everything, orphan and unlovable, the boy came, rescued her and loved her. It was him who made her continue to this hopeless life and for that, she was somehow grateful to him, even when he cheated at the end.

Perhaps, it was time for her to build a life of her own now.

"Brother Don?" Lyndon couldn\'t help but repeat the call that Simione used for him. Brother Don. It had been a long time since the girl last called her that, perhaps two years ago, when they weren\'t lovers yet. It was an old call but why does hearing it bring some pain to his heart?

"Yes, Brother Don. You can leave now," Simione knew he just came to Comis Village for her and so she told him to go. She knew his new woman, she wasn\'t as patient as he thought she was and so she wouldn\'t appreciate it if the man stayed here in the mountains for long. "I\'ll come home after my time here. You can leave first,"

"I...I…." Lyndon did think of leaving right away with Simione. He knew she would easily forgive him. The girl was always forgiving with him. However, she somehow changed and from the look of it, he knew he cannot insist on leaving with her right away.

"I\'ll stay for a couple days," He continued. For some reason, he didn\'t feel like leaving Simione alone yet. It\'s like once she gets out of his sight, he will lose her forever and he wasn\'t sure then if he can deal with that. 

"Are you sure?" His decision instantly formed lines at Simione\'s head. Him staying was like asking for trouble with his new woman, nevertheless, it wasn\'t her business anymore. She also doesn\'t own the place so she cannot force him to leave even when she really wanted to be in a place far away from him then. Seeing him around was crushing her heart, especially when none of the people in the Comis Village knew yet that they had already ended their relationship.

"Yeah I\'m sure, I haven\'t been here for a while anyway," He confirmed and felt satisfied with his decision. He was very aware that whoever was waiting for her in Devon City won\'t like him being away for long, but he can\'t help it. He can\'t help being away from Simione then and so deep inside his heart, he knew he cannot just leave and lose her in the process. He certainly didn\'t expect things would turn complicated on his part and even when he wished he could just pause and turn things back to how they were, his pride made him unable to do so.

Clearly he was regretting how he hurt Simione but he was a coward to admit the truth, the only thing left of him then was make sure the girl forgives him and that no matter what happens, she would still go home to the Tangs. Only by that he can be eased, only by that he can remedy what had already been said and done.

"If that\'s the case, you should tell them," Simione reminded him. For a moment, he thought what she said as he was not able to comprehend it but slowly, he understood it. The people in the Comis Village didn\'t know that they already broke up and so Simione was asking him to personally tell everyone that they had broken up.